Classic and Contemporary Poetry: Explained

In the twentieth entry of Adrienne Cecile Rich's "Twenty-One Love Poems," the speaker delves into the complexities of an intimate relationship marred by emotional barriers and a failure of communication. The poem navigates through a sense of loss and regret, examining the distance that has grown between the speaker and her lover. It's a poem of yearning, an attempt to grasp the essence of a love that is slipping away-or perhaps has already disappeared-into a labyrinth of "secrets" and "fear."

The opening line introduces a "conversation we were always on the edge / of having," indicating a persistent failure to communicate effectively. The phrase "on the edge" encapsulates the poem's sense of urgency and peril. It's a conversation that could have, perhaps should have, happened but remained perennially deferred, running "on in my head" for the speaker.

The setting of the poem-the Hudson River "trembling in New Jersey light"-is symbolic and affecting. The Hudson serves as a metaphorical boundary, a liminal space between clarity and obscurity, reflecting "polluted water yet reflecting even / sometimes the moon." Just as the river reflects the light, albeit polluted, the speaker discerns a reflection of her loved one drowning "in secrets, fear wound round her throat / and choking her like hair." The woman's unspoken fears and secrets, symbolized by the metaphorical "hair," serve as a suffocating force, effectively drowning her.

The poem gradually reveals a startling twist, as the drowning woman "with whom I tried to speak" turns out to be a manifestation of the speaker's "own soul." The poem suddenly transforms into a journey of self-exploration, as the speaker realizes that the emotional barriers and inability to communicate were not just problems with her lover; they are intrinsic to her own being as well.

The lines "whose hurt, expressive head / turning aside from pain, is dragging down deeper / where it cannot hear me" amplify the tragedy. There's a cruel irony here; the 'expressive head' is actually inexpressive when it comes to articulating pain and fear. The head turns "aside from pain" in a futile attempt to avoid it, only to find itself "dragging down deeper."

The poignant ending, "and soon I shall know I was talking to my own soul," reveals the haunting realization that the conversation the speaker longed for was never external but an internal dialogue. It conveys a regret for not understanding oneself and, by extension, the person one loves. In its heartbreaking candor, the poem explores the debilitating power of unsaid words and unshared feelings, both in relationships and within one's self. Rich captures the ineffable sadness of looking back on a failed relationship and realizing that the love wasn't merely lost but was, perhaps, never fully understood to begin with.

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