Classic and Contemporary Poetry
AN IDYLL OF PHATTE AND LEENE, by ANONYMOUS First Line: The hale john sprat - oft called for shortness jack Last Line: And thus the dinner-platter was all cleared Subject(s): Burlesque; Striptease | ||||||||
THE hale John Sprat -- oft called for shortness, Jack -- Had married -- had, in fact, a wife -- and she Did worship him with wifely reverence. He, who had loved her when she was a girl, Compass'd her too, with sweet observances; E'en at the dinner table did it shine. For he -- liking no fat himself -- he never did, With jealous care piled up her plate with lean, Not knowing that all lean was hateful to her. And day by day she thought to tell him o 't, And watched the fat go out with envious eye, But could not speak for bashful delicacy. At last it chanced that on a winter day, The beef -- a prize joint! -- little was but fat; So fat, that John had all his work cut out, To snip out lean fragments for his wife, Leaving, in very sooth, none for himself; Which seeing, she spoke courage to her soul, Took up her fork, and, pointing to the joint Where 'twas the fattest, piteously she said; "Oh, husband! full of love and tenderness! What is the cause that you so jealously Pick out the lean for me. I like it not! Nay, loathe it -- 'tis on the fat that I would feast; O me, I fear you do not like my taste!" Then he, dropping his horny-handled carving knife, Sprinkling therewith the gravy o'er her gown, Answer'd, amazed: "What! you like fat, my wife! And never told me. Oh, this is not kind! Think what your reticence has wrought for us; How all the fat sent down unto the maid -- Who likes not fat -- for such maids never do -- Has been put in the waste-tub, sold for grease, And pocketed as servant's perquisite! Oh, wife! this news is good; for since, perforce, A joint must be not fat nor lean, but both; Our different tastes will serve our purpose well; For, while you eat the fat -- the lean to me Falls as my cherished portion. Lo! 'tis good!" So henceforth -- he that tells the tale relates -- In John Sprat's household waste was quite unknown; For he the lean did eat, and she the fat, And thus the dinner-platter was all cleared. | Discover our Poem Explanations and Poet Analyses!Other Poems of Interest...LOVERS, AND A REFLECTION by CHARLES STUART CALVERLEY AFTER IKKYU: 14 by JAMES HARRISON COMMONPLACES by RUDYARD KIPLING TO A BURLESQUE SOUBRETTE by CHRISTOPHER DARLINGTON MORLEY MARTIN LUTHER AT POTTSDAM by BARRY PAIN BURLESQUE by VICTOR GUSTAVE PLARR TIS A LITTLE JOURNEY by ANONYMOUS "'TIS MIDNIGHT, AND THE SETTING SUN" by ANONYMOUS |
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