Poetry Explorer


Classic and Contemporary Poetry


BILLY'S EPIC POEM by OLIVER MURRAY EDWARDS

First Line: THIS IS BILLY'S EPIC POEM
Last Line: THEY CAN'T COUGH NO MORE.
Subject(s): SUNDAY, WILLIAM A. (BILLY) (1862-1935);

This is Billy's epic poem
Tho' Rody calls it rhyme,
Still both of them are worried
When it's coughin' time.
Rody does some talkin',
Shows 'em how to cough,
While Billy glowers about him
Like he'd treat 'em rough.

Rody tells 'em plainly
His is the only plan,
That other styles of coughin'
May bust their diafram.
Other styles of coughin'
May make an awful muss,
Spill their teeth or sumthin',
Split their 'sophagus.

There's just one way to stop 'em
And that's to treat 'em rough,
Sic the Swedes upon 'em
'Til they've had enuf.
Homeopathic treatment
Only makes 'em laff,
What that bunch is needin'
Is an osteopath.

Work their spinal columns,
Twist 'em by the neck,
Punch 'em in the gizzards
'Til they are a wreck.
They may kick a little,
And be awful sore,
But when their windbags busted
They can't cough no more.



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