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THE MASTECTOMY POEMS: 2. THE GURNEY, by             Poet Analysis     Poet's Biography

Alicia Suskin Ostriker's poem "The Mastectomy Poems: 2. The Gurney" delves into the disorienting and surreal experience of being prepped for surgery, capturing the vulnerability and detachment that accompany this moment. The poem juxtaposes the clinical environment of the hospital with the speaker's introspective and almost dreamlike state, exploring themes of mortality, identity, and the suspension of reality during the transition from consciousness to anesthesia.

The poem opens with a description of the environment from the perspective of the speaker lying on the gurney: "What's this long corridor above the street / What are these glazed beige tiles." The use of questioning here suggests a sense of disorientation and unfamiliarity, as the speaker, now horizontal, views the world from a position of vulnerability. The corridor and tiles, ordinary in their description, take on a strange, almost otherworldly quality when seen from this prone position, emphasizing the speaker's altered state.

The speaker then reflects on her own vulnerability, describing herself as being "so like an undemanding child." This simile highlights the regression to a state of helplessness, where the speaker, much like a child, is entirely dependent on others for care. The use of "undemanding" suggests a surrender to the situation, an acceptance of the lack of control over what is about to happen.

The image of being wheeled "in my bassinet / Into the operating room" reinforces the sense of infantilization and the return to a state of dependency. The comparison of the gurney to a bassinet evokes the idea of a rebirth or a journey back to a place of origin, as the speaker prepares to undergo a procedure that will alter her body and, by extension, her identity. The operating room, with its "muslin sheets so dry and white," contrasts starkly with the speaker's "humid body's doom," highlighting the sterility of the environment against the visceral reality of the human body.

The ceiling lights, described as "radiant" and "buzz[ing] appealingly for me alone," further contribute to the surreal atmosphere of the poem. The lights, which are typically impersonal and functional, are personified and seem to take on a special significance for the speaker, who interprets their brightness as if they are uniquely meant for her. This perception underscores the isolation and the heightened awareness of her own experience as she lies there, feeling "special" in the moment, even as she is about to undergo a surgery that millions of others have faced.

The introduction of the Haitian nurse and the surgeon pulling on rubber gloves grounds the poem in the reality of the impending operation, but even these details are filtered through the speaker's heightened and detached consciousness. The nurse and the surgeon, though essential figures in this scene, appear almost as actors in a play, performing their roles as the speaker observes with a mixture of detachment and focus on sensory details.

The anesthesiologist, who "tells something reassuring to my ear," represents the final connection to the conscious world before the speaker drifts into unconsciousness. The specifics of what is said are less important than the tone, which is meant to soothe and calm, but the speaker's mind is already transitioning away from the present.

The poem's closing lines introduce a powerful and surreal image: "And a red moon is stripping to her waist— / How good it is, not to be anywhere." The "red moon" symbolizes a transition, perhaps the shedding of blood or the exposure of something hidden, and the act of "stripping to her waist" suggests vulnerability and revelation. This image of the moon, often associated with femininity and cycles, could be a metaphor for the speaker's own body, which is about to be exposed and altered by surgery.

The final line, "How good it is, not to be anywhere," captures the speaker's desire for escape, for the relief of not having to confront the reality of the surgery and its implications. It reflects a longing to be free from the physical and emotional weight of the moment, to exist in a state of nothingness where there is no fear, pain, or worry.

"The Gurney" is a poignant exploration of the moments before surgery, where the speaker oscillates between awareness and detachment, reality and surrealism. Through its vivid imagery and introspective tone, the poem delves into the emotional and psychological landscape of a patient facing a life-changing procedure, offering a glimpse into the complex interplay of fear, acceptance, and the search for peace in the face of uncertainty.


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