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HOW TO BE OLD, by             Poet Analysis     Poet's Biography

May Swenson’s “How to Be Old” is a contemplative exploration of aging as a process of transformation, acceptance, and reconciliation with time. The poem reframes aging not as a decline but as an achievement, requiring effort and mindfulness. Through metaphor and tone, Swenson conveys a vision of aging that is introspective, poignant, and ultimately affirming.

The opening lines set the stage for the poem’s central paradox: “It is easy to be young, / (Everybody is, / at first.) It is not easy / to be old. It takes time.” Youth is presented as an effortless, universal state, one that requires no labor or intention, while age is portrayed as an accomplishment that must be earned through the passage of time. Swenson immediately upends conventional notions of aging, rejecting the idea that youth is inherently superior or preferable. Instead, she positions age as the result of a journey, requiring skill, resilience, and the ability to “work a magic to mix with time.”

The metaphor of the doll becomes the centerpiece of the poem, symbolizing youth and the way it must be carefully preserved, cherished, and occasionally revisited. “Youth is given. One must put it away / like a doll in a closet, / take it out and play with it only / on holidays.” The doll represents the vitality and innocence of youth, which cannot be held onto indefinitely. Instead, Swenson suggests that youth must be treated as a treasure—handled with reverence, but not allowed to dominate daily life. This act of putting youth “away” implies a conscious detachment, a mature acknowledgment that life continues beyond its early stages.

The description of the doll as requiring care—“One must have many dresses / and dress the doll impeccably”—underscores the importance of respecting and honoring one’s youthful self. The meticulous care given to the doll mirrors the introspection and emotional labor involved in aging gracefully. Yet Swenson also cautions against displaying youth for others: “(but not to show the doll, to keep it hidden).” This suggests a private, personal relationship with one’s past, a contrast to societal pressures that often encourage people to cling to or flaunt youthful appearances.

Swenson further complicates the relationship between youth and age by emphasizing the act of remembrance: “It is necessary to adore the doll, / to remember it in the dark on the ordinary / days.” This recollection is not sentimental nostalgia but an act of self-congratulation and continuity. “Every day congratulate / one’s aging face in the mirror.” By urging readers to celebrate their aging selves, Swenson challenges the societal stigmatization of aging. The act of “adoring” one’s past while embracing the present creates a holistic understanding of identity, where youth and age coexist harmoniously.

The poem’s structure mirrors its meditative quality. Swenson’s free verse allows her thoughts to flow naturally, mimicking the reflective process of looking back on life. The repetition of “in time” in the closing lines reinforces the inevitability and gradual nature of aging: “In time one will be very old. / In time, one’s life will be accomplished.” The cadence here is deliberate, evoking the steady progression of years and the fulfillment that comes with a life well-lived.

The final image of the doll, “like new, though ancient,” encapsulates the poem’s central theme. The doll, representing youth, is rediscovered at the end of life, not worn or diminished but preserved and intact. This metaphor suggests that youth, while fleeting, leaves an indelible mark that can be revisited with joy and reverence. The phrase “like new, though ancient” juxtaposes the timelessness of memory with the reality of aging, underscoring the enduring value of life’s early experiences.

Ultimately, “How to Be Old” is a celebration of life’s entirety—its beginnings, its transformations, and its culmination. Swenson offers a perspective on aging that is neither mournful nor resigned but rather deliberate and affirming. Through the metaphor of the doll and the interplay of youth and age, she invites readers to view aging as a process of self-discovery and integration. The poem’s gentle yet profound wisdom encourages acceptance of the passage of time and the recognition of the beauty inherent in every stage of life.


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