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Classic and Contemporary Poetry
ROSAMUND GRIEF, by GORDON BOTTOMLEY Poet's Biography First Line: I fasted, prayed and scourged myself Last Line: An angel in god's sight. Subject(s): Grief; Sorrow; Sadness | |||
I FASTED, prayed and scourged myself, Each ineffectually, For still I heard God say "Take up Thy cross and follow me"; I longed to feel some part of God, So sought His bloody tree. I told the priest, who saw me stand For eagerness unshod And half unrobed: he said "You sin And earn a fiery rod, Sending your dark delirious soul A-whoring after God." I cut strong shoots and firmly twined A crown of passionate thorn; I set it on and crushed it down Until my brows were torn: "Lo, now" I said, "I am Queen of Heaven, This searching crown being worn." I put nails through my shrinking hands, Nails through my twitching feet; The rapturous pain my body rent In pangs unearthly sweet; I filled that irised, throbbing haze Where soul and body meet. I felt as Virgin Mary felt When God grew big in her, Heavy with birth of holiness That gave mad throes to bear; But higher than she, for God at last Disowned her nursing care. Pain is the last and deepest pleasure That God grants to His own; It probes hid chasms of fierce delight To gentle ways unknown; 'Tis man's sole sense of eager passion Like God's intense to the bone. I pierced my side -- as His was pierced -- In agonies devout, And blood and water, mixing there, Dripped reverently out; A sign that He had blessed my act How can you dare to doubt? I felt a halo round my head Burn purple on my brain, And flash across my reeling eyes In shuddering gusts of pain; Then swooned, and leaped to stabbing life, And straightway swooned again. I saw the Virgin weep in night; Her humble face of faith Was an epiphany of pain: She is the type of death, Having been doomed to make her God Subject to change and death. She said "My Son in many ears My motherhood denied; To you he sends this spousal kiss, To you blood-sanctified. 'Tis ever thus; all men forsake The mother for the bride." When I awoke, white death-clouts stiffened About my limbs and face, And I was coffined narrowly, Washed for the burial place. Know you how long I was dead to earth? Listen: Three nights and days. So much of death God granted me -- His own dear share, no less -- That I might be a sinless saint Cleansed from the world's caress: Was this not His convincing love Of my deep holiness? I feel my body's aureole, A pulsing breathing light -- The cool transfiguring radiance Of angels benedight; Proving that though on earth I am An angel in God's sight. | Discover our Poem Explanations and Poet Analyses!Other Poems of Interest...SONOMA FIRE by JANE HIRSHFIELD AS THE SPARKS FLY UPWARDS by JOHN HOLLANDER WHAT GREAT GRIEF HAS MADE THE EMPRESS MUTE by JUNE JORDAN CHAMBER MUSIC: 19 by JAMES JOYCE DIRGE AT THE END OF THE WOODS by LEONIE ADAMS |
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