Poetry Explorer- Classic Contemporary Poetry, VOLAPUK, by BERTON BRALEY



Poetry Explorer

Classic and Contemporary Poetry

VOLAPUK, by             Poet's Biography
First Line: The city man took off his coat and his hat
Last Line: "zymole clupeco omega fels naptha pineoleum teco!"
Subject(s): Advertising


The city man took off his coat and his hat
And sank in his old swivel chair.
He pushed on the buzzer, and promptly at that
He found his stenographer there.
She took out her notebook, disposed of her gum
And waited to take every word,
And then she was stricken teetotally numb
When these were the sounds that she heard:

"Dimalite capsicum crex coca cola musterole domino taps pianola hunyadi ricoro
acousticon crisco sealpackerchief formamint skookum nabisco!"

The frightened stenog gave a terrible shriek
At the gleam in the city man's eye.
She knew by his looks and his language unique
His brain had gone wholly awry;
The doctor was summoned, but seemed at a loss,
Then sadly he waggled his head
For when he attempted to question the boss
That worthy repeatedly said:

"Uneeda cortina congoleum rit tuxedo kazoo bon ami sonora elcaya sapolio brit
usola bel ans b. v. d."

They took the boss home where his grief-stricken wife
Remarked, "As I feared, he's insane.
He's ridden on trolleys so much of his life
The ads have affected his brain.
But maybe there's hope; I will try to awake
The spark that has flickered and died.
Oh, speak to me, Alfred; speak sense for my sake!"
But all that he ever replied

Was: "zozodont sunkist mazola pyrex bulgarzoon grafonola victrola grapola
zymole clupeco omega fels naptha pineoleum teco!"





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