Classic and Contemporary Poetry
CHARADES: 6, by CHARLES STUART CALVERLEY Poet's Biography First Line: Sikes, housebreaker, of houndsditch Last Line: To witness if I lie. Subject(s): Wit & Humor | ||||||||
SIKES, housebreaker, of Houndsditch, Habitually swore; But so surpassingly profane He never was before, As on a night in winter, When -- softly as he stole In the dim light from stair to stair, Noiseless as boys who in her lair Seek to surprise a fat old hare -- He barked his shinbone, unaware Encountering my whole. As pours the Anio plainward, When rains have swollen the dykes, So, with such noise, poured down my first Stirred by the shins of Sikes. The Butler Bibulus heard it; And straightway ceased to snore, And sat up, like an egg on end, While men might count a score: Then spake he to Tigerius, A Buttons bold was he: "Buttons, I think there's thieves about; Just strike a light and tumble out; If you can't find one go without, And see what you may see." But now was all the household, Almost, upon its legs, Each treading carefully about As if they trod on eggs. With robe far-streaming issued Paterfamilias forth; And close behind him, -- stout and true And tender as the North, -- Came Mrs. P., supporting On her broad arm her fourth. Betsy the nurse, who never From largest beetle ran, And -- conscious p'raps of pleasing caps -- The housemaids, formed the van: And Bibulus the butler, His calm brows slightly arched; (No mortal wight had ere that night Seen him with shirt unstarched;) And Bob the shockhaired knifeboy, Wielding two Sheffield blades, And James Plush of the sinewy legs, The love of lady's maids: And charwoman and chaplain Stood mingled in a mass, And "Things," thought he of Houndsditch, "Is come to a pretty pass." Beyond all things a baby Is to the schoolgirl dear; Next to herself the nursemaid loves Her dashing grenadier; Only with life the sailor Parts from the British flag; While one hope lingers, the cracksman's fingers Drop not his hard-earned swag. But, as hares do my second Thro' green Calabria's copses, As females vanish at the sight Of short-horns and of wopses; So, dropping forks and teaspoons, The pride of Houndsditch fled, Dumbfoundered by the hue and cry He'd raised up overhead. They gave him -- did the judges -- As much as was his due. And, Saxon, shouldst thou e'er be led To deem this tale untrue; Then -- any night in winter, When the cold north wind blows, And bairns are told to keep out cold By tallowing the nose: When round the fire the elders Are gathered in a bunch, And the girls are doing crochet, And the boys are reading Punch: -- Go thou and look in Leech's book; There haply shalt thou spy A stout man on a staircase stand, With aspect anything but bland, And rub his right shin with his hand, To witness if I lie. | Discover our Poem Explanations and Poet Analyses!Other Poems of Interest...A BALLAD OF BASEBALL BURDENS by FRANKLIN PIERCE ADAMS BASEBALL?ÇÖS SAD LEXICON by FRANKLIN PIERCE ADAMS BRICKS AND STRAW by FRANKLIN PIERCE ADAMS LORD HEYGATE by HILAIRE BELLOC ON A GREAT ELECTION by HILAIRE BELLOC IMITATION OF THOMSON by ISAAC HAWKINS BROWNE IMITATION OF SWIFT by ISAAC HAWKINS BROWNE HIC VIR, HIC EST' by CHARLES STUART CALVERLEY |
|