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SATIRE ON THE HEADS OF HOUSES, by                 Poet Analysis     Poet's Biography
First Line: O cambridge, attend
Last Line: We say nothing at all.
Subject(s): Cambridge University


(OR, NEVER A BARREL THE BETTER HERRING)

O CAMBRIDGE, attend
To the Satire I've pen'd
On the Heads of thy Houses,
Thou Seat of the Muses!

Know the Master of Jesus
Does hugely displease us;
The Master of Maudlin
In the same dirt is dawdling;
The Master of Sidney
Is of the same kidney;
The Master of Trinity
To him bears affinity;
As the Master of Keys
Is as like as two pease,
So the Master of Queen's
Is as like as two beans;
The Master of King's
Copies them in all things;
The Master of Catherine
Takes them all for his pattern;
The Master of Christ
Hits them all to a hair;
The Master of Christ
By the rest is enticed;
But the Master of Emmanuel
Follows them like a spaniel;
The Master of Benet
Is of the like tenet;
The Master of Pembroke
Has from them his system took;
The Master of Pembroke
Has all the same features;
The Master of St. John's
Like the rest of the Dons.

P.S.--As to Trinity Hall
We say nothing at all.





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