Poetry Explorer- Classic Contemporary Poetry, POSTMASTER-GENERAL WILL HAYS ENTERS INTO HOLLYWOOD, by STODDARD KING



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Classic and Contemporary Poetry

POSTMASTER-GENERAL WILL HAYS ENTERS INTO HOLLYWOOD, by                     Poet's Biography
First Line: Hays came first, with a guard of marines
Last Line: "we are saved, will hays, we are saved!"
Subject(s): Hollywood, California; Parades


Hays came first, with a guard of marines.
(Are you saved, Dave Griffith, are you saved?)
Hallelujah! cried the actorines.
(Are you saved, Charlie Chaplin, are you saved?)
Then came the cowboys, swaying in their saddles,
Then the comedians, a-swinging of their paddles;
Handsome heroes with their hair pomaded
Marched behind the General, strutted and paraded.
(Are you saved, Mack Sennett, are you saved?)

Hays came first with his teeth shining white,
Beating the bass drum with all his might.
(Are you saved, Bill Hart, are you saved?)
Boom, boom, boom-boom-boom!
Boom, boom, boom-boom-boom!
All the directors with their shiny puttees,
Ten thousand cuties with dimpled knees.
Hallelujah! cried the guard of marines,
Pounding out the chorus on their tambourines --
Zing, zing, zing-zing-zing!
Prominent producers, plutocrats,
Wearing little haloes on their tall silk hats --
(Are you saved, Doug Fairbanks, are you saved?)

They marched into Hollywood, beating on their drums,
Right through the harem scenes, right through the slums,
Right across the desert with the camels and the sand,
Tambourines banging in the Promised Land!
Zing! said the tambourines, zing! zing! zing!
Zing, zing, zing-zing-zing!
As Hays and his penitents started in to sing --
(Are you saved, Mary Pickford, are you saved?)
Bang! went the pistol of a Wild West sheriff,
Shooting German films with a pro-tective tariff.
Bang! went the rifles of the press sheet dispensers,
Firing volleys at the ranks of the censors.
Hays bore the banner,
Hays beat the drum.
(Are you saved, Charlie Ray, are you saved?)
Hollywood basked in its copyrighted sun.
(Are you saved, Tom Ince, are you saved?)
Hollywood wondered what was being done.
(Are you saved, Ben Turpin, are you saved?)
Out from the bungalows the people came pouring,
The comedy lions all came a-roaring --
Gr-r-r-r-r-r-r!
Vampire and villain, cave man and bum,
Following the boom of the big bass drum.
Boom, boom, boom-boom-boom!
Boom, boom, boom-boom-boom!
And they saw Will Hays and his sanctified band
Raising their banner in the Promised Land;
And they heard Will Hays in a voice like the sea,
Shouting, thundering: "Listen to me!
Listen to me!"
His words were like flame, his words were like fire,
His words purged Hollywood clean of mire,
His words made Hollywood whiter than the snow.
And all of the people started in to sing,
Started in to sing:
"We are saved (boom, boom),
We are saved (boom, boom),
We are saved, Will Hays, we are saved!"





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