YOU may not gather gold nor land, Nor wear a jeweled crown; You may not sway the multitude, Nor gain a great renown; But you'll always find a welcome, And your friends will wish you nigh, If you strive In conversation to Eliminate the I. Your home is like a palace, And your wife is hard to beat; Your sons are modern Chesterfields, Your daughters passing sweet: Without your aid, I truly think, These things your friends descry— So no matter what You talk about, Eliminate the I. Say your neighborhood is charming, Or exactly the reverse, Discuss the latest german And its mazy steps rehearse; Say grown up people fume and fret, Say babies always cry— But no matter what You talk about, Eliminate the I. Say Easter dresses will be trimmed In pleats or bias fold, The wind is shifting to the west, To-morrow will be cold; You may talk on any subject Underneath the arching sky— But no matter what You talk about, Eliminate the I. You may worship high officials Or declare their course is wrong— Shall a few men rule a nation, When rights to all belong? You may preach about the tariff, Lauding low, condemning high— But no matter what You talk about, Eliminate the I. Dost hope to be a Talleyrand?— A diplomat to be?— Then treasure this advice—'twill prove Invaluable to thee. The rule is universal, Will to every case apply— No matter what You talk about, Eliminate the I. | Discover our Poem Explanations and Poet Analyses!Other Poems of Interest...A,B,C by CHARLES STUART CALVERLEY SONNET (ON RECEIVING A LETTER INFORMING ME OF THE BIRTH OF A SON) by SAMUEL TAYLOR COLERIDGE A DOUBLE STANDARD by FRANCES ELLEN WATKINS HARPER THE BRITISH CHURCH by GEORGE HERBERT EPILOGUE TO THE SATIRES: DIALOGUE 1 by ALEXANDER POPE EPITHALAMION by EDMUND SPENSER |