Poetry Explorer- Classic Contemporary Poetry, HERE IS MUSIC: 6, by AUSTIN PHILIPS


Poetry Explorer

Classic and Contemporary Poetry

HERE IS MUSIC: 6, by                    
First Line: In callow youth
Last Line: Far down, from heaven, towards hell.
Subject(s): Youth


IN callow Youth
My instinct cried, "Prepare!"
Clamoured, "Acquire equipment, seek for Sooth!"
Than Manhood bade me dare.
Ere I set forth, I sought from Heaven one meed,
Which was ... that my horizon might recede
Unceasing ... that each goal I came to clasp
Should shrivel in my grasp.

I thought that he
Touches true height who strives
Without surcease or stay; held travelling hopefully
Better than to arrive.
So was it I put up that passionate pray'r,
Placed my frail foot on Life's stupendous stair,
Hitched my ideals to a hidden Star,
Sacred, sublime, afar.

The High Gods heard,
The Great Gods smiled, and gave
Consent—their subtle, vicious, two-edged sword—
In cynical conclave.
I toiled, I moiled, on upward journey bent,
In what I deemed divinest discontent:
Stubborn I lived. Devotedly I clove,
And climbed ... and star-ward drove.

I found success,
(Or what men give that name!)
To fling it from me in disdainfulness,
As trivial thing and tame;
Gathered fresh forces, then, with small delay,
Drew out, once more, on worthier essay:
Each time I conquered, victory seemed vain,
And I set forth again.

Love came to me,
(Like every fighting man,
I longed for Love, in silent secrecy!)
Love lingered but a span.
I loved afresh. Love faded. I fought on,
Fell victim, yet, 'neath Love's dominion,
But to escape it ... as through some perverse,
Evil and cruel curse.

Thus Youth went by,
Watered with blood and tears.
Age came. Strength lessened. Unremittingly,
Through grim, grey, faithful years,
I passioned onwards, steadfast to my course,
Unconscious, still, of slowly lessening force. ...
Then sudden saw, fair-shining and afar,
Life's quest, that long-sought Star.

Full in Life's sky
This showed and hung. It shone
Upon me with incomparable radiancy,
Divine effusion. ...
It made my being glow. It warmed my heart,
Seemed the Sun's image, Self, and counterpart. ...
Even as I gazed, I gasped and stayed my breath,
Swift as one gripped by Death.

I stood agape.
My amazed, rejoicing eyes
Saw it assume a woman's gracious shape,
Which did emparadise
My soul, outstrip my dreams, make happy naught
Of old unhappy years, ful-filled, full-fraught
With fearful sufferings, infinite array
Of griefs, on Life's long way.

Before me leapt
Vision and hope, so fair
That momentary madness fell, and swept
Me through, as I stood there,
Passionate in worship, hungry to possess
Planet pursued through long elusiveness. ...
Then, sane too soon, I knew my soul's sole mate
Met, tragically, too late.

For, though so close
She stood, my helpless hand,
Made weak by Age and effort, with my Rose—
By merciless command
Of those great Gods who granted me past pray'r—
Failed to make contact. I, in stark despair,
Heard their Homeric laughter as I fell,
Far down, from Heaven, towards Hell.





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